Saturday, August 15, 2009


I have a brilliant idea for a cheese shop! I'll call it "Cheezus Christ". In the front window we'll have an enormous sculpture of Jesus on the cross. Made of cheese! I know, right! Freakin' brilliant! So Jeezy Cheesy is on the cross but instead of looking all... like... well, like Jesus on the cross, he'll look like he's really freaked out! His eyes will be saying, "holy fucking shit, I'm nailed to a goddamned cross!" We'll have tons of christian puns, we'll sell chunks of our window sculpture as "The Body of Christ". We'll have slices of cheddar in the shape of the beast of revelations, and it just wouldn't be complete without "Sacrificial Goat Cheese"! Before you know it we'll have a location in EVERY town! Well except for in the mid west. And most of the east coast. And a really big portion of the west coast. Maybe just one location. In a town with a lot of atheists.

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